A Work of Art Restored

Hi all!

I know it’s been a while since I wrote. I haven’t felt that I had anything important to share, so I guess sometimes less is, well, less.

Lately, though, I have been thinking a lot about how God formed me. He has a plan for my life, and I realized that circumstances, my own choices, and interactions with other people may have marred the image God had planned for me.

Let’s image ourselves in God’s studio where He created each of us. I am going to let my imagination go a bit here. Pretend, just for a moment, that God closed His eyes and thought to Himself: I am going to design a Louise. She will be 5 feet 5 inches tall. She’ll have blue eyes the colour of a summer day, her hair will be black and curly, and she’ll enjoy food, but she’ll also enjoy being outdoors where she can see my love for her. Her smile will be contagious! Some may call her plain, but she is beautiful to me. And her personality…hmmm. let me think! He leans back and taps his chin. This is my favourite part, He says to Himself. Ah ha! She looks like an artist! She will make pictures that will move people’s souls. And she will love to host parties, so she’ll need to be able to cook! And especially bake! And Louise will be loyal and kind, and careful with other peoples’ hearts. Ah, yes. She’s exactly like I imagined! And then The Father, wrapped her in a baby’s body, and knit her together in her mother’s womb.

Little Louise was born, and God’s perfect plan was in place. Sadly, she was born into a world broken by sin, and as she grew, some things happened. Louise was in an accident when she was little and one leg ended up being shorter than the other, so she grew up with a slight limp. The kids at school called her names, and she became self-conscious. She liked her curly hair. It made her feel like a princess, secretly, and she became a little vain. about it. She felt it distracted from her limp, too. She loved to ride her bike and swim and hike, but she was too short and her frame was a little to big to be considered trim, so the bullies at school made fun of her weight. She became too embarrassed to wear her bathing suit and quit the swim team. Too bad – she was just about to qualify for the national swim team, but she never knew that. She loved to draw when she was in school. When she was in university, her art professor encouraged her to have a showing. She held such promise, but she was still learning technique, and trying to find her style. The reviews were good, except for one that was scathing. She put down her brush and switched her major. As an adult, she hosted parties and she cooked and baked and loved. And because she was good at it, she had friends. Unfortunately, she felt she had to be the perfect hostess, and she often reviewed conversations, hoping she hadn’t hurt anybody’s feelings or caused some offense. She tried so very hard to be the perfect friend!

Instead of the image God had for her, Louise tucked away pieces of herself and made other parts of herself more important than they should have been. Louise never felt that she was enough.

At 55 years old, it dawned on me that maybe we’re all a little bit like Louise. Does anybody else out there feel like they gave up a passion they had because someone thought it wasn’t good enough? Does anybody else out there overcompensate or take on more than they should because other people have encouraged you to, even though you know it isn’t really your gifting?

When I do the things that God gave me the gifts for, I feel joy, excitement, and fulfilled. I don’t need, or sometimes don’t even want, an audience. Conversely, when I do things because I have accepted other people’s expectations or standards for my life, I somehow feel less. For example, I know I like to talk, but I was made to feel that what I had to say was too opinionated and I talked too much, so I stopped being outgoing and tried to fade into the background. I was miserable! That isn’t who I am. I care about people and desire to connect – an extroverted introvert, if you will. Needless to say, that didn’t last long, but I still do try to think before I speak. Too bad I have a Ferrari mouth and a Beetle brain, but I try.

My friends, I would like to encourage you to try to find that person you were in the beginning of your life. You know, before life twisted you up and confused you. Did you love to dance, or paint, or sing, or cook? What calmed and soothed your soul? Age is just a number, so please don’t say that you are too old. Maybe you can’t do ballet anymore, but maybe you can still line dance? Or maybe take an art class at the local community center? Maybe just have people over and cook together?

And maybe, it’s time to lay some things down. Do you like to have people over, but really don’t like to cook, so you won’t invite people over because you can’t through a dinner party like Alice? Maybe rethink: potluck or order in or cold cuts. People will come to see you, not your food. God calls us to all sorts of things, and occasionally, He calls us to step out of our comfort zones, to stretch us, or to fill a need. These are good things. Don’t be afraid to do these things, but examine your heart. What is your motivation? Is is to answer a call, or to fit yourself into someone else’s idea of you?

Thank you for taking the time to read this. It is meant, solely to encourage. I am not a life coach or counselor. This is just my personal opinion. Feel free to offer feedback. What are your thoughts?